Who'd be a writer?

Or should that be 'Who'd try to be a writer?' Solvey's flagging up of yet another internet incident was a reminder of just how tough it can be when you present your thoughts to the writing world in the form of a story. Whatever the rights and wrongs, the whole thing could have been avoided by keeping reviews initially internal, away from the public eye. Both the writer and the reviewer, along with the website administrators, could determine the veracity of the argument. The all-important word integrity needs a look-up. It was self-published ffs. There had been no hammer beforehand by anyone other than the writer. The review that sparked the latest row was actually rather light in terms of assistance to the reader. It lacked substance, which, I believe, caused the negativity - true or false - to stand out. Nothing, though, could have prepared anyone for the writer's response! Don't get me wrong: I've had a blast back at reviewers and commentators in the past. It is everyone's right to defend yourself, especially if you are right. You cannot say 'don't defend yourself in public' if the review is made in public. However, you really must try to determine if you are right if you are going to argue back. Being poked with a pointed stick is no fun, and some people sharpen their sticks for no other reason than jealousy and their own inability to get anywhere, or to be recognised as good in their chosen field. "Look at me! I'm disease free!" is usually the real motive behind the stick. They are trying to impress someone, and may have their backing for any number of reasons. The reviewer is not always right, and if there is no reply, other people who are inexperienced, open to suggestion because of their lack of experience/knowledge, may believe the reviewer is right. What future will they have in the writing world if they follow perceived truths that are anything but the truth? And I'll repeat: it was self-published! Criticisms either way meant nothing. There was no pass or fail along the way. It just went up for sale by personal right. No agent; no traditional publisher. I'll leave the indies out, as the spiral hasn't been fully established yet. Enough said. I've got four trusted readers who I can rely on to give true reviews, as opposed to reviews with ulterior motives: Solvey, Noel, Rich and Becca. They are worth a million would-be fiction reviewers I've encountered. And they work with a view to agent/publisher submissions. Not self-publishing.

A weekend's a long time in football

So it proved! My beloved Man Utd produced a second half performance, the like of which no other team could have produced - discounting Newcastle's 4-4 draw with Arsenal, which was great to see, but which was a rarity away from Man Utd. And everyone else's results were not good enough. Surely, we have begun the push towards greater glory at the end of the season! Two months are a long time in writing, too. Especially when I haven't written anything down on paper. I'm thinking about stuff, though, and an idea I've had, which, if it works, could open up things even further in terms of direction. I must guard against introducing new things without thinking of the consequences. But it seems to be a good thing this time, and could be used later in any future books - if I manage to create them. I won't write until I must, so I have to wait. Won't be long, as I can feel it. It's the way of my current method. It's worked so far, as it's kept me seeing and writing the same vision. Can't be bad, can it?

Phoenix from the flames

That was a much better peformance from the guys in red! Arsenal played well enough, but they had no answer to the relentless movement the new formation created. The da Silva brothers were a revelation in their forward postions, and the return of Valencia gave me great hope for the future. Even Gibson showed more than he has been. Not sure what's going down with Berbatov. It may be that he doesn't fit in any more - his recent rise to prominence came when nobody else up front was doing it. Now that Hernandez and Rooney are showing signs of gelling, Nani and Valencia might find even more space to create stuff. I'd be surprised if Berbatov puts up with the substitute bench and I think he could be off to Europe next year. I hope he proves me wrong, though.
I think Marseille don't have anything to offer and our glorious Red Devils might sneak this Champions League. The Premiership is OURS!

Quo vadis?

Now that I'm well into the story proper and contemplating the future, I've found myself again thinking about the kind of agent who might be interested in my tale. I've looked around and noted the names of agents who are looking for science-fantasy. One of the agents listed is the one that gave me my best-ever reply to an earlier work, but which also gave me my worst rejection, in terms of emotional impact.
"Your work is very well-written, and you have done well to send this to me."
My heart-rate increased.
"Unfortunately, my preference is for dark fantasy, and I would therefore find myself unable to represent you..."
My heart stopped. I'd hit the post... again.
With this new one, I feel like I'm writing a big one (well, that's always the plan with my stuff), with future tales attached. Hate to think I'll hit the post with it, though I have to be prepared for it.
On that note, I sincerely hope Man U don't hit the post against Arsenal like they did against Liverpool. I can take defeat in an important match, but not in the manner of that last one. Not recommended!
Saturday... a new day...

The Devil may care!

No, I'm not getting all religious! As you can see by a couple of my friends' comments, it's easy to dismiss if you don't actually care. And why should they? Another question could be: why don't they? Personally, I think most people actually shy away from the truth (or a difficult question), preferring not to dwell and, instead, make light of things. They probably do care, just won't go there. Or have been there and won't go back there, for some reason.
Experiment over: I got the answers I expected. And one that I didn't expect, so I deleted it - well, it is my page!

As a writer, though, I have to go there.

But I've had to ask myself: who would be interested in a story that may ask more than the usual questions of life over death? How many would care? Obviously, some people wouldn't care, in any walk of life.

So I guess, then, you have to ask the right people. You have to attract the right audience, or appeal to the right people. The ones who care. So who are they?

And if I can unearth answers - at least, answers that may not be truths but are plausible answers in relation to the story, would they accept them as possible truths and ask questions back, or reject them as rubbish and move on in search of something else?
They'd have to have bought it first! Aha! The secret to a bestseller, perhaps.
Hmm, I need to ask more questions. Especially of myself. And at least discover who my audience is expected to be.
A rather disjointed post, probably reflecting the point I've reached within the tale.
Writing life...

Who created the Devil?

Hmmm...

The Ides of July

Best not say beware of them!
But I must be aware of them!
I'll be off for two weeks in the middle of July. I fancy taking off somewhere different and contemplating my fate.
lol
At this point, I'm determined to have at least half of the story done. Further, I'm also determined that a couple of new things won't have been introduced yet and so there will be something left to freshen things up and help to maintain interest. Of course, if I'm desperate for change at that point, then I'll probably be in trouble. It's not a sticking point for me, just I'd like to think my sleeve is large enough to hold something important that's going to be hidden up there.
My reminder to myself not to let up with anything, nor must I rush anything. Timing...

A far window

Having written the eighth chapter in brief, and while preparing for its imminent expansion, I began to look at my notes and the future steps I must take as the story began to move upon its own propulsion. I say 'own', as it is the personality portraits I have created that have thus far carried the narrative to this point i.e. I've tried to write the story while matching the personality traits and past life histories that brought everyone there.
But that was dealing with the initial premise of the story, which, at some indeterminate point, I knew would fan out into a tale of conflicting destinies. Roughly translated, I had always known I'd better get these moments right, or the cab would jump from the rollercoaster track and I'd be lost in double-quick time.
In about two or three chapters, I feel I will have to stop writing in order to plan the steps toward the mid-point of the story. Although the mid-point is there in my notes, I get the feeling that there is a lack of knowledge and information dealing with the happenings around this time. Although I do know what happens, it seems pretty certain that I'd better plan with more thoroughness the movement to it, through it, and beyond it. Otherwise, I'll ruin everything and make a mess.
It won't take long; a fair amount of it is there already.
I did discuss this at length with Noel the Ultimate Proofreader, although 'discuss' is too light a word: Noel's ears are probably ringing after listening to my lengthy monologue concerning control and application. That I must write what I see, and not allow any deflections of any kind as to the direction of the story.
I did also reveal to Noel that , without overly thinking of it, I had stumbled upon the notion that two future books in this story can be seen right away. The ending of this first book contains the premise for the second book, though perhaps (not yet) its title; and the title for the third book has been discovered, though not the actual storyline - it's there, in my head, and the title inspires my thoughts, but I can't go there just yet.
I've also rediscovered the name for the hero's lover, which I've googled and also found, but her nature and presence I've not fully crystallised. I'm getting there with her. Just got to be careful that I represent her truthfully.
Lots of doors; lots of trapdoors.

This road...

... seems to stretch on and on.
I did say that I'd like to spend more time with friends and family. Nothing ever seems to pan out the way you want, though. A social life and a writer's life are often contradictions in terms: you can't have one with the other. Some people can do both, and I hope they do. I'm one who can't; something has to give, and I have to write. I changed my life in 2006, leaving Local Govt for good. Life, and illness, and everything that came with it, stopped everything for quite a while. I know that now. Everything changes for a reason, and who I was is not who I am now. I can't afford to waste this opportunity. It won't come again.
I've got five days off from the 14th, during which time I'll be piecing together the movement into what I've always termed 'the river', or the main storyline. Up to now I've been introducing the hero and his friends, and an elusive enemy. Most of the scene has been set, hopefully without any static, and lots of intrigue - my 'take' on how this story should begin. Of course, my marvellous readers have virtually dictated the opening chapter's style. It was the only place in the whole story for it, and it works. So I can listen when I have to!
Noel the Ultimate Proofreader has made a very good point: that I've given myself a massive task. Noel's natural concern that I do it justice after I'd explained some things in the tale that nobody knows yet. It's a big ask, I know, and quite a few times I have wondered if I was up to it. Solvey's poem challenge indicated to me that I can pick up anything and make something of it. It was a relatively small thing, but big enough to mean quite a lot. The same attitude will be needed to complete this story. Every writer should be lke this, inside their head. Only time will tell if I'm actually like this for real.
I'm having fun, though, in that I am, at last, doing what I set out to do in 2006. Things have taken shape, and very much in the way I wanted them to. This story can only look one way, so I must ensure that it does. One day this child will grow into adulthood.
Not sure if I meant the story or me... :-)

Editing

I've done quite a bit of editing, lately. I had to: there were too many rough lines and repetitions. I've enjoyed it, though. It made me go back over everything and evaluate previous chapters. I have a slight problem, in that I'm not 100% sure whether the current seventh chapter is actually the eighth. The one that may have to go before it hasn't been written yet, but there are some good notes waiting for me to read about it (told you I had planned a bit beforehand). I'll make a decision after that. It's good, though - I'm into the story and heading into more of the future happenings. There are subjects that I haven't touched on, but they will appear and I'm not too far off exploring them.
I haven't used any of the flashbacks yet, either. They are for later and must be placed at the most revealing points in the story.
I do feel a bit 'lighter' in my head about everything. I guess I had been getting bogged down with a million things. Actually, I feel like I've fallen through a hole in a wall and discovered an exciting world, only to realise I am still in the original one, just a different place.
Odd, but good!
So, if I'm now going to write a new chapter, and there are lots still to come, I'll need my pen...

My New Year's Resolution

I made a half-decent bolognese tonight. I was tired and it was easy: out of a jar and out of a packet. There was enough to feed four, but I whittled it down to two after I had two platefuls. A triple chin awaits!
Got me thinking...
Work and writing have conspired to separate me from my friends and family. It's my fault, of course - I do have a choice. I have such wonderful friends and family, so I should see more of them. I do feel I haven't been the greatest of friends, nor the greatest relative. Wrestling with words takes it out of you, but that's no reason to neglect your life. It will pass you by before you know it. And I know it.
The rest of this week will see me completing those first seven chapters. I've written every day since Christmas Eve, and when I return to work on the 10th, I'll allow myself to get into more of a general routine.
So, to my New Year's resolution. Two, actually.
The first is, of course, to be the best writer that I can be. The second is to see more of my friends and family. There is no excuse for doing neither.

Unemptiness

I said this.
Sheesh!